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Also this area is weird af, we were walking past a house when suddenly we heard a robotic sounding 'YOU THE DADDY' so we stopped dead for a little bit, but as soon as I started moving again the house blurted 'YOU THE DADDY'. I peered in and it looked empty, but it carried on you the daddying us until we were off the street O.O

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I guess I should do a little and plug my shop :P

Hello! I'm Brynn and I love to paint traditionally and digitally, I'm quite new and have a lot of learning to do. I've set up a store for my prints, so you can purchase my art to go on stationary, books, clothes or whatever :-) More prints coming soon! redbubble.com/people/FrazzledB

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Mom brought a chicken back from the barn because she wanted to hang out with her.

I really need new glasses but that's too expensive. rip, eyes.

Oh shit I need to 'borrow' me some rosemary clippings

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Me: i love Mastodon. Decentralized social media all the way. i hope everyone quits Twitter and signs up

Me: *thinks about my co-workers seeing my profile*

Me: some people can stay on Twitter. That's fine

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broke: assuming everyone on the web goes by he/him

joke: referring to people by they/them until you are familiar with their pronouns

woke: checking the profiles of everyone you talk to to find out their pronouns

bespoke: regularly checking the profiles of even your oldest mufos to see if their pronouns have changed because you respect their agency and want to give them space to blossom

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meds Show more

Actually I owned a chilli pepper plant that only ever grew many peppers the length of a thumb nail. Maybe I'm just great at bonsai veg?

lewd Show more

How do I get carrots to grow big cos my last ones were micro carrots

A kestrel landed in our garden whilst we were out there, the other birds were not amused :P

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If you’re one of the people who fix wooden pipes while sleepwalking, but you opt not to brag about it ... you’re a humbler lumber slumber plumber

Idk about fixing pipes whilst sleep walking but I've been caught just stood at light switches flicking them on and off for a while until I wander off back to bed

Ooo I should make a bee house from the bigger bamboo bits

Woops I gardened too hard and now my limbs aren't working very well

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glitterkitten

sparkle sparkle, bitches