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here are the matching scarf n hat for my grandparents, where i learned to do lace & fairisle, and slippers for my partner & mother in law!!

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howdy howdy!! i have made a colouring page out of the witch and it is available for download for less than Β£2 c': she will also be a sticker soon!!!

etsy.com/uk/listing/962980258/

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hello naughty children it's posting all the memes on my phone time

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emotions are Big and terrifying but so is the sea and i love her so it's probably going to be okay

ok google: why doesn't my brain have an ass so i can kick it

lewd but funny work thing 

Had some big burly guy get all shy about telling me his login password was "dickhead100" and would only let me know by spelling it out. Buddy, you need to learn a lesson from the old woman that said her password was "bendmeoverandfuckmeupthearse" with a wry smile, get over it

I don't have perfect posture because I'm a gentleman of high social stature, I have perfect posture because if I lean in any direction, my hats will fall off and kill anyone standing too close to me.

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actually the british spelling of quing is queueing

@pizza best of luck to you, my house already has a devestating gnome infestation. They're chewing through my electronics and raiding my pantry

stocking up on gnome repellent and gnome netting. always remember to store your perishables in a gnomeproof container.

(sits bolt upright in a cold sweat) someone on this earth is sexually attracted to the bean furby

@seafrog are you looking for something classic or new and spicy? because you can't go wrong with oh worm? or oath worm

wild that its been a year since i started this and we are still in lockdown

(yes i put it in a bag and forgot it existed shut up)

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there are wild green parakeets that just kinda coexist with the seagulls on this road and i am perpetually thrilled about it

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glitterkitten

sparkle sparkle, bitches